wait.

9 02 2010

From as far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be the fastest.  I had 2 older brothers and a slew of neighborhood kids I was in competition with. It was simple; faster was better. Growing up, I could say “I’m one of the fastest runners in the school”.  I was always one of the first to be done with tests, homework and those of you who know me well know that I always finish my food first!

At home my Dad would play the “think fast” game with us. This was basically my Dad throwing some random object at one of us and then yelling “think fast” and hopefully we caught the object before it smacked one of us in the gut.  It was a very fun game, but no one wanted to be the one with slow hands!

In high school I loved sports. I loved the feeling of running fast. I was very proud to be fast. Fast meant better. Fast meant smarter…right? I couldn’t even fathom why someone would not want to be FAST like me! There was no possible way that a person would ever do things slowly on purpose. Right?

Being fast at everything yielded one result- impatience. This is something I’ve obviously had to struggle with. If you are the fastest at everything, you end up waiting for everyone else. So, do you really win? All of the waiting…waiting in line, waiting for friends to finish eating, waiting for someone to come pick me up, waiting for all of the slooooow cars. To me, waiting was just a waste of time- a huge, boring waste of time.

September of 2007 was the month we found out our little boy would have hydrocephalus. When we found out his diagnosis, I wanted all of the answers. Fast.

No luck.

There was only one answer… Wait.

So, we have been waiting since  September of 2007 to find out the prognosis of our little boy. We will continue to wait at least another year until we know for sure how he will fare. Has all of this waiting been a waste of time?

No way. These past years have been the hardest and the best years of my life.  I can’t even put into words how I have grown or how we have grown as a family.  God is in control and definitely has a great purpose for all of this. And I am proud to say that am truly savoring my life at a much, much slower pace.

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4 responses

9 02 2010
Josephine

Wonderful post.

10 02 2010
kim

love it. i needed that. thank you

10 02 2010
Michelle

Wonderfully said. I am much the same sort of person – never sit still, when there is a problem it is to be addressed immediately and solved. Boy was I in for a shock with Owen! Hydrocephalus has taught me patience in a way that probably nothing else ever could have. I’m happy to hear that it has done the same for you.

11 02 2010
Kristen

Well stated Sherri!

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